Gays vs. The Religious Right -- The Grudgematch

Yeah, like a homophobic tirade wouldn't be at all home here...

This isn't that. And it is. Or is it? To tell you the truth, I've forgotten already...

Oh, right! The topic is: Gay Marriage/ Gay Adoption/ Gay Milkshakes/ Gay... what have you.

Hoo boy, what a huge topic lately. And maybe it should be. The fact that there are elements of our society who seem to think it should be alright to take every homosexual in sight and hang them from the nearest tree is fairly scary and disturbing, but the politicization of the homosexual issue (whatever that issue may be) is something scary in an entirely different way.

I imagine there may have once been a time when one's sexuality was their own business, and not the concern of public domain. There may have once been a time such as this, but to tell you the truth, I can't remember it. And this may be because our society has chosen to divide itself along the battle lines of "gay vs. straight", and while one side seems to think it is going to force the world at large to accept and embrace it the other side seems to think it should have the right to wipe the other side out entirely.

And then, there's the rest of us, caught in the middle of this facade. Wondering "wait, whose business other than my own (and a consenting partner) where I stick my dick, or possibly a feminist-approved dick-substitute (at least according to Freud, who, as we know, was an immensely funny individual... at least I know he makes me laugh) other than my own?"*

We live in an age of partisan everything. Partisan politics, partisian religion, and now partisan sexuality.

Take, for example, the kerfluffle over the recent film Alexander. Now, according to a lot of gay and lesbian writers, we are supposed to believe that cutting the gay sex out of Alexander makes it a bad movie. Which doesn't, and which it isn't. One thing this is is censorship, which as many of us will agree is a bad thing, but it doesn't make this a bad movie. In fact, I probably (scratch that, definitely) enjoyed this movie a lot more because of the lack of gay sex. However, I do not approve of artistic censorship, but that's beyond the point.

It is extremely sad that some people seem to need to identify their sexual orientation/ethnicity/what-have-you with famous or historical figures in order to attempt to engineer acceptability for something that is already acceptable to begin with. The truth is, these people aren't trying to engineer acceptability, they're trying to engineer comfort. They are attempting to make themselves more comfortable with themselves by attaching a label that they (or someone else) have attached to them by also attaching it to someone else. The debate over whether or not Alexander the Great was gay is an example of this.

Alexander the Great may have been gay (as opposed to bisexual, or perhaps even heterosexual), but truthfully, this is incidental. What should it matter to anyone else what Alexander the Great did in his bedroom? Not a whole lot, truthfully.

Whenever I attempt to make the case that we do not truly know whether or not Alexander the Great was gay or bi or not, a lot of people make the assumption that I am assuming that he was straight, as if this would be any more foolish than assuming that he was gay (well, we know that Alexander had a son, but all we have to corroborate claims that he is gay is translations from legends written more than 2300 years ago, regardless, this is beyond the point).

There is also the vicious branding of closeted homosexuals as "cowards". While there may be a lot on the line for a lot of people with this issue, when our society will not respect the privacy of individuals (even within the confines of their own bedroom) we have a serious problem. I'm wondering: if organizations like GLAAD (mostly good people who do good work) are wondering what entities such as, say, the state of Alabama (so many backward jokes, so little time) are doing in their bedrooms, why does no one ever ask what GLAAD is doing in the bedroom of the governor of the State of New Jersey (I can't remember his name, and I'm too lazy to look it up)?

That, my friends, could be construed as hypocrisy.

But let's talk about hypocrisy, because it is one of my favourite subjects. Excuse me, one second, I have to go change hats...

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OK, I'm back. Miss me? Yes? Good. No? I love you too. Anyhoo...

How about the religious right on this issue? Yes, we all love them with their "god hates fags" talk, and I thought it was sooo classy when they propested outside of the funeral of a murdered gay teen ager. What a great bunch of people.

God, as we all know, is supposed to be perfect. In the minds of these people, how does this correspond with also being a bigot (as they would tell us). Oh, yes, homosexuality is sinful. But, wait... if homosexuality is a sin, why did god create homosexuals?

Yeah, we'll be waiting for a clear answer on that for quite a while.

How about Jesus, who taught us to love thy neighbour, and who loved his own neighbours regardless of who they were? Let's have a real close look at the bible. If Jesus comes back right now (right now!) who's he going to hang with? George "Dubya" Bush or those gay pride parade folks who got pelted with pig manure in the states. By the way, that was real classy, as well.

Pens down, people. Who did Jesus hobnob with? If you said "the gutter folk" then you are exactly right. And why did Jesus hobnob with the gutter folk? Because they needed his love the most.

And maybe that's part of my point. If we're going to love our neighbour (in that brotherly, good will towards men sort of way) then maybe the idea of loving (in that brotherly good will towards men sort of way) that gay guy down the street shouldn't seem so repulsive to us. But wait, there's more!

Growing up, we are taught pretty often that people are not going to like you. People will find reasons not to like you. That's life. We can't make everyone we meet like us... but what if we could?

Would we want to? Should we want to? That sounds like an essay coming on...

But, it's New Years Eve, and I'm late for getting drunk, so I've gotta cut this short.

The idea that gays and lesbians are going to force people to accept them is folly. And truth be told, if someone looking for a reason not to like you finds "you're different" to be an acceptable reason, do you want that person as your friend or neighbour? Probably not.

There is no sense fighting battles that you aren't going to win. Thankfully, in this little dispute, there are plenty of battles that gays and lesbians ARE going to win. Like the battle of gay marriage. Accepbability will come later. Right now, just win the little battles.

The war will follow.

* Yes, I know that's a long fucking sentence, but it's a good one, ain't it?